For teenagers who complain there is nothing to do in Ōamaru -  21st Century LifeSkills could be the thing.

Self-described “bored” teenagers caught tagging buildings around town have spurred personal development specialist Amanda Fleming to diversify into sharing what she does best with young people.

After more than 35 years working in personal development with 100,000-plus adults and thousands of businesses and organisations, it occurred to Amanda the sooner people can get these skills on board, the better.

“Why shouldn't teenagers have the same skills that I'm teaching adults, in the domains of communication skills, and growing emotional intelligence? Because we know that if we don't learn to get along with other people, then life is harder. And if we do learn to get along with other people, we get more of what we want,” she says.

With the help of trained facilitators, Amanda is looking at running one two-day course every school holiday. The first workshop is planned for the last weekend in January, for up to 36 high schoolers.

She has worked with teens in the past, and is resurrecting an upgraded version of a workshop she has previously had success with.

The LifeSkills course is not specifically for high achieving, nor troubled teens, it’s targeted at those who might be “kind of looking for a little bit more”, she says.

“A little bit more inspiration in their life, and a little bit more purpose and meaning.

“It's teenagers who know that there's something more, you know, but they don't know how to get at it. Or they're inspired and want to move and shake the world, but they don't know how to get organised. 

“They feel like ... ‘If they were just a bit more confident they could, dot, dot, dot’. 

“You know, confidence would be a key outcome that we're looking for. More self-belief, more self-esteem, better people skills.”

Despite the advances in technology and the fast-changing world, these are skills that will always be important, she says.

“So, like . . .  your girlfriend or your boyfriend dumps you, you've got to navigate all of that. There's no app for that. There's no pill for that. That's personal growth, you know?”

Emotional intelligence, communication skills, learning to manage pressure and stress are all things Amanda offers in her public workshops with adults, together with a personal growth framework that is non-religious, and all inclusive.

“It wouldn't matter what gender or culture or how you identify. It is simply a growth framework. 

“The way I think about that is, if you were growing beans, they could all just grow along the ground in the dirt, or you could provide them with a framework that they can climb up so they get the best resources, you know, they get better sunshine and they get things which help and enable them to thrive.”

To make the weekend as accessible to teens as possible, Amanda is seeking sponsorship from businesses, and she already has three on board. 

She is happy to outline the benefits to any potential sponsors, and has a proposal document for anyone who is interested in supporting the initiative. 

The first 21st Century LifeSkills for Teens weekend will be on January 27 and 28, from 9am to 4pm, at Ōamaru’s Business Hive - “introducing the kids to that grown-up environment”. Registrations are open online now.

The bonds formed between the teenage participants is something she hopes will continue long after the weekend is finished.

“It's designed for young humans in a stage of life that can be quite confronting, quite challenging. It's the biggest transformation they will ever go through, other than life and death . . .  and so the workshop, I would hope, would help them form firm friendships, so they have got someone they can call at three o'clock in the morning if they're worried.

"They have got a friend they can talk to, to get stuff out of their head.”

Amanda has lived in Ōamaru for nearly four years, after moving from the North Island. She grew up in Dunedin, and moved north when she became a police officer in her 20s. 

It was during her time with the police she was drawn towards personal development.

“I saw lots and lots of perfectly intelligent people doing really, really stupid things.  And I was also very aware of myself, being a reasonably intelligent person, and I was making dumb decisions and doing really stupid things too.

“So I got very interested in what motivates human behaviour, and ended up going on a workshop myself . . . It was transformative, and it helped me see myself, my relationship with others, my relationship with everything, it helped me see that differently.

"So the result was a shift in my perspective that transformed my attitude towards myself and my own place in life, and . . . I discovered there was a little bit of hope for me.

"This is not where someone can do your homework for you, this is work that we do on the inside that only we can do, and the purpose of this workshop is to provide young people with the tools to do that work.”

As she approaches the end of her career, Amanda is motivated to “pass on the passion”. 

“I haven't got children, so my books, my online course, my workshops, my kits, if I can pass that on to other people, you know, while I can. That is the goal.

“It's also about contributing to the Waitaki being a learning destination where people come to learn, because I truly believe everything grows in the Waitaki, including people. 

Potential sponsors or participants are invited to email Amanda at [email protected], phone 021 357 753 or find out more here.